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3/29/2009

How to recognize people who don't love?

Some people love love. It is so beautiful to argue for love. That behaviour is included too in the tools for the bad guys. They show off publicly their ardent love but their words will follow no deeds.

How do I recognize who is who? Baddie or do-gooder? I know everyone has his or her method.

A simple exercise is to imagine the person concerned as in a daydream. Only in this daydream, the person to whom I am interested in has a life of its own. I wait until he or she starts acting unpredictable for me.

In my exercise I see a colleague from work. It takes a while before he moves. I'm curious what he will do. He plants a tree and enjoys the green. I get the impression of a very solid feeling of ownership. The tree has to pay the colleague with growth. He expects a reward for the work from the plant.

Now I let a sick dog, with a lame paw run alongside my colleague ...

My colleague sees the dog and goes into the house. When I confront him again with the dog, he gets a gun and shoots after the dog. Hm, seems this is not to be love. No matter. 2nd attempt

I let a crying child run around. My colleague gets to the child, takes the child and brings it to his wife. Clearly he has a soft sport for delegation .....

And so on. I can work out some scenarios in which the ability to love is tested. I develop a picture of the person which I could revise and correct later on, if the person starts to act ....

9 comments:

Jena Isle said...

I have a scenario for you Ray. Let's see this woman works part time for you. You're not well off, you scrimp for a living, but every time she comes for help, you give, no matter. Eventually you come to learn that what you have given was for her lazy strong husband who waits at home for her. What would be your reaction? Knowing full well, that what you have given her could well be used by relatives or kins.

I do help when I can, but I'm not a saint. I got angry, and refused to help from then on.

Ray Gratzner said...

Dear jena, isn't help always a support for people who want to help themselves?

If that lazy strong husband is the problem, i would feel exploited, because I was deceived about who would benefit from my help.
It could well be, that I would reject further help.

It is your energy that you have to protect or you will be in trouble in the end.

So I can understand you quite well...

Happy Blogging

PinkLady said...

This sounds interesting Ray. Visualization is indeed a powerful tool. Now how do I start doing that? I only work on instinct. The loud warning bell in my head. However, I'm stubborn most of the time. LOL!

Have a blessed week, friend!

Bing (",)

Laane said...

And still, it's all in your mind...

Hope you won't misjudge me...

Ray Gratzner said...

Dear pink lady,

if you want to try it, take your time...relax...and dream a little bit, that is all, no rules no laws...

Happy Blogging

Ray Gratzner said...

Dear laane,

I can perfectly live in peace with that statement. That is one legitimate point of view.

You could expand your experience by trying out...you need not to....

Happy Blogging

Mark said...

Very interesting.

Ray Gratzner said...

Dear mark,

you are welcome....

Happy Blogging

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