Knowledge II

"Today, we start having a look at the power of thought and energy. Do you believe that thoughts have power?"

"Hmm, yeah sure thoughts have power, because depending on how I think I will do this or that."

She smiled broadly and she smelled like an evening breeze in a lemon tree grove. "Thoughts have little energy. You see, I am a Seeress. By this I mean that I can see the way to liberation according to the definition given earlier. Remember that, if you later will get in contact with other standpoints. Standpoints maintaining that thoughts create the world, that thoughts determine your life and so on. I do not think much of such positions. We stop the thoughts and liberate us from its burden, because we can live without thinking. "

"You mean thoughts lead to nothing," I did not think so. It was too easy and it was contrary to my everyday experience.

"Look, Ray, many people revolve in their thoughts around things that they can not move. They can not even realize that they cannot change the things, because the cannot see the road to freedom. Would they see their way to freedom, so as I do, then they would realize that they direct their life energy to a change in their lives, which will not happen, can not happen because they have no influence on them . "

She spoke calmly, slowly with selected breaks. This silence captured me and awakened a yearning in me. The yearning for clarity and security.

"Look at me many years ago. I was bleeding energy of life, because I iamgined, I would have to find true love. With a man!" Her eyes were big and looked at me. It seemed she waited until I woudl comprehend the enormity of the task, but why should a man not be capable of true love?

"I spent years of my life studying the psyche of men. Dear men attracted me, but I felt no physical longing. Mean men were interesting, but they disgusted me. I tried to create a sweet man who would be interesting and with whom I could develop myself. "

"So I studied copy over copy of your species, trying to understand and change, and yet - success was not granted to me what made my search for a success only more painful and intense. I was caught by the obsessive search for the man who would bring true love. "

"Then I remembered seeing in the middle of a conversation with my former partner."

"It was staggering. I just fought with my partner about whether he should or should not accompany me to dinner with a friend. It was my girlfriend and I wanted to go alone. He, however, obviously jealous and simultaneously denying it, saw this as an act of love, to accompany me. The long way home - and in the dark.... and, and. "

"Suddenly I became dizzy. I had shortness of breath and it rang in my ears. The world became flowing and objects were without limits and the first thing I realized in my changed perception ....."